Wow. Nomar is a Cub.

So, I've been doing the best I can to keep up with our beloved Cubs even though I'm way out here. The fact that I can watch Chicago's FOX Sports Network at work is a big part of that. But here comes my opinion and my questions for you back home.

First, I've always been a fan of Nomar's. I think he's got a big heart, a consistent bat and is a great shortshop. He's also been pretty injury free in the last few years aside from his big injury at the start of this season. But did they really need a shortstop? I thought it was no secret that the Cubs relief pitching staff is their weakness, shouldn't they have found some people to plug that hole?

Second, we all know I don't like Sosa and this is a great chance for all those wannabe Cubs fans (the ones who go on Friday nights, not for the game but to chat and turn it into Dance Wrigley) to see what fielding is all about. The whole "I-sneezed-and-destroyed-my-back" fiasco really didn't help his case. Oh, and when he stereotypically fanned on that pitch during this year's home-run derby. While he's still a huge slugger I kinda home that next time I go to Wrigley, if it hasn't collapsed yet, I hope to see more Nomar jerseys than Sosa jerseys.

Discuss.

I'm not one to complain about celebrity behavior, because if I were in their position, I'd be behaving just as badly.

But seriously folks, someone needs to take away Wilmer Valerrama's little black book, or PDA, or whatever he has, because he seems to have a list of girls on the brink of turning 18. He just sits and waits for the legal system's egg timer to ding and then he moves in for the kill. See Lindsay Lohan for present reference; see Mandy Moore for past reference.

You'd better keep your heads on a swivel Emma Watson and Dakota Fanning...

The White Castle adventure was quite possibly one of the biggest let downs of my life. Kyle (who has more pics), Connie and I were so hungry and our hopes were so high, that when we arrived and saw the lamely decorated mock-up of a White Castle, we instantly knew it was going to be bad. Then we were given what could only have been microwaved Slyders (one per person too) without anything to drink in our Harold and Kumar promo cups.

"I expected to wait in line for hours," Connie said. Instead we walked right up to a window where they slapped us in the face with reheated patties.

It just sucked.

And this first pic is our old aparment, now demolished so some jackass could make a crapload of money. God bless America.

This is the best news I've had since moving to Califonia:

As part of a special promotional event, White Castle is opening its very first restaurant on the west coast for an 11-day promotional event leading up to the release of the film. The full-scale replica of a White Castle Burger restaurant will be located at 8301 W. Sunset Blvd. (across the street from The Standard hotel) and will be giving away 50,000 free White Castle hamburgers over the course of the week in conjunction with local radio station Power 106 FM.

The promotion kicks off with a star-studded ribbon-cutting event, to be held July 22 at 8:00 pm, and will run through August 11.

The full press release is here. Move over In-and-Out...

"It's not bad because I'm always tired. My life is a state of jet lag."

- Kyle Ford

Due to the fact that I've seen quite a few celebs around here in the last couple weeks (Trey Parker and Matt Stone all the way to a unconfirmed Tom Cruise) I've decided just to be a tourist and post who I've seen and their rating on my celebrity scale.

So here we go.

WHO: Tommy Hilfiger and Ally Hilfiger (you can't miss the teeth)
LOCATION: The Grove movie theater
CELEB GRADE: Tommy - B-; Ally - C+

On the way out to California, I picked up a postcard in every state. This one was from Nebraska and it reads "Punching Cattle on a Jack Rabbit."

I have no idea what that means.

I call this display, "It Could Have Been SO Good." That's my dad trying to fly a kite on a day with no wind. Now you see where I get my bright ideas from.

Kyle gave me a scanner and I've got two huge boxes of old photos. Expect more gold like the pictures above.

In belated celebration of our nation's freedom, I figured I'd share this conversation with you.

A little history first though. I don't really remember how this British chippy started IMing me, but it was almost two years ago. Somewhere in that time, she got weird. Babbling on about her relationships and I started ignoring her and ultimately it led to this conversation.

Tonight, she tried again. The following conversation took place and I didn't change any of her grammar:

BRIT: welcome back ignorer
DAVE: I'm sorry, i think you have the wrong screen name.
BRIT: i dont
BRIT: Dave
BRIT: y dont u rember me
DAVE: No. This is paul.
BRIT: Slizois
BRIT: Paul who?
DAVE: That's none of your business.
BRIT: u serious not pretending to be called paul so i dont talk to you
BRIT: sorry for asking
BRIT: do u know where dave is?:
DAVE: I have no idea who Dave is.
BRIT: u sure/
BRIT: cos ive had this screen name down for a yr
BRIT: shame cos i was gonna tell him a secret
DAVE: I just signed up like two weeks ago.
BRIT: weird
BRIT: u from usa then?
BRIT: hes done a runner on me
DAVE: I'm kidding. This was dave. You're dumb.

[Dave Sliozis has signed off]

"Veep"

There's no way to make the title Vice President sound cool, so just don't try.

Or any less creepy for that matter. See Sarah Part One and Sarah Part Two.