I mean...wow.

Let's do this, a summary for those who don't care and then a detailed recap for those who might.

WHO: Queensryche
WHERE: Universal Amphitheater
PERFORMANCE GRADE: A-
VENUE GRADE: A
HUMANITY GRADE: C+

So Connie and I swallow our pride and head into the valley to find the Universal Amphitheater (connected to the mega-tourist mall, Universal City Walk). We read that doors opened at 7pm, and taking the rain into account, left home around 5pm. Of course a break in the rain and uncharacteristically empty freeways allowed us to get there in about 25 minutes. We would also come to discover that show time was 8:15pm, so awesome.

We arrive and it's freezing, everything is wet, however the usual amounts of nasty shoppers is WAY down. We grab a bite to eat, make love to a food court heating lamp and go in search of the theater.

Never having been to the Amphitheater before, we're not really sure where to go but there are persons hovering about that are UNMISTAKABLY Queensryche fans. For instance, the 50+ year-old woman wearing FAR too little clothing, drinking from a red plastic cup and RIDING IN A WHEEL CHAIR TO MOOCH OFF THE HANDICAPPED SEATING! The lady was walking along in her wheel chair. COME ON.

They finally open the dark gate and lead us down to the theater, where we'd wait outside for at least another hour freezing our asses off.

However, standing about the group of clearly diehard 'Ryche fans would offer MUCH entertainment.

First, there were these two dudes we had noticed earlier. One guy, the more normal of the two (if possible) wore a leather jacket with a pile of skulls airbrushed on the back.

I don't think you actually read that, so here...A LEATHER JACKET WITH A PILE OF SKULLS AIRBRUSHED ON THE BACK! BWAAAAAH!?

He stood and told his buddy all this crap about how he's trying to get into SAG but was upset that his agent kept typecasting him as...wait for it...wait for it.......ah, you got it already, didn't you? It was AWESOME. At one point, he was talking about some guy and his woman moving in and he stated, "Remember when that girl Midnight moved in with me and got all bossy? I was like, bitch, there's the door!" HE KNOWS A GIRL NAMED MIDNIGHT!?

And then, oh man, there was his friend. This guy was trash to his very Schlitz filled core. We affectionately nicknamed him "College," and I'm sure you can guess why. College's best quote was this in regards to the thickness of his skull, "I've been smacked on the head with skateboards, bashed with clubs. Hahaha, It's given out at least ten concussions..." Yeah, I stood three feet from this hero.

College also engaged in a discussion with another fan about how, when he saw this show a year ago, Queensryche lead singer, Geoff Tate, still had long rocker hair. The other fan mentioned that she had seen them only a few months ago and Tate had since cut his hair to a short top. College refused to believe this nugget of information and I think I saw him crying in the eighth row when it turned out to be fact.

And then there was the group in front of us in line who were clearly rocker-turned-corporate types. They were with this babbling idiot girl who proudly declared, "...and my right eyebrow is actually way bigger than the left." That's all you really need to know about them.

Throughout the evening, there were the much expected scary people, girls with massive silicon chests (I made Connie wait stand and watch the girls bathroom with me so we could see this one trainwreck of a girl with THE BIGGEST BOOBS EVER), and the occasional fan who clearly didn't fit in with the crowd anymore (citing the guy who sat in front of us with his Adidas hat and khaki dockers).

The show was actually really good, aside from the fact that we were on the top level and literally the last two seats at the right side of the auditorium. The band was great, Tate's vocals still pack the 80's punch, and the guitars squealed as if they were still holding up years of big hair and coke binges.

Our only complain was the video portion of the show. There were monitors hanging out over our balcony, but instead of showing us what was happening on stage, they were just synched with the actually stage's background projection. There where many times we couldn't see what was going on up stage. Which wouldn't be a big deal if Operation: Mindcrime wasn't a theatrical production with acts taking place on stage. That's right...theatrical production. Apparently the entire album tells a story, I'm sure Connie can offer more about that.

The show did rock, I swear. I'm not going to say it competes with the Popmart Tour, but hey, that's comparing apples to 50-foot lemons.

OH, and near the end, Tate was strapped into a straight-jacket and sang with the microphone cradled against his chest. That's rock.

A night in words coming tomorrow. And believe you me, there will be PLENTY of words.

And sorry for the CRAP quality of these photos, my phone seems to be going all Ford on me.

Connie and I are off to see Queensryche tonight. Should be interesting because I'm 99% sure I've never heard any song in their catalog.

Chili's got new menus, thought you'd like to know.

I knew a guy back at Highland Junior High named Justin Kay who had glasses just like that. I think they even withstood the piledriver that Chad True dished out to him during the lunch hour in seventh grade.

It was really a well executed piledriver for a twelve year-old.

Whirlwind catch up post:

• John C. McGinley is the most underappreciated actor of our time.


• Gray hairs are moving in and forcing my gorgeous browns out. I'm officially three weeks past my usually six-week-haircut and they've taken this time to gather an army. This is the longest my hair has been since the cool-at-the-time bowl cut of my late high school years.


• Next time you get behind someone driving a Saturn, look out. I've noticed an increase in nothing-to-lose behind the wheel antics with that group. Rolling stops, dodging garbage trucks, flying through red lights. You know your cars are plastic, right?


• Congrats to the brains behind advertising The 129th Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show who also celebrate the brilliance behind "The Final Countdown" (link goes to the Europe official site, and it's SO worth the visit).


• The most recent Victoria's Secret catalog is huge disappoint. Photos are dark, models look stiff, the whole think stinks of amateur. But panties are 5 for $20. But still...very amateur.


• Our admitted guilty pleasure, CBS's "NUMB3RS," has Neil Patrick Harris as a guest star this Friday, February 18th. You'd be a damned fool not to TiVo that.


• I know they're "hipster" and I know they're the next over-exposed band, but I DON'T CARE! The Arcade Fire's new album, Funeral is some of the best music I've heard in a while. Guess it's time to dust off the ol' trucker hat.


• And finally, yes, I know it's very sad but I've lost all my shame. My name is Dave Sliozis and I am a Halo 2 addict.


• And some photos, since I haven't taken photos with a real camera in a long time:

I'm going to have to wait for the master of bedhead to give me a ruling in this badboy. I hope I get some extra points for eye-baggage and a pretty good "there's something on my head" expression.

New design courtesy of me, layout/backend/crap-I-don't-know courtesy of Kyle. Still some burps and farts, but it works for the most part.

I hate when companies try and use dead celebrities to sell me things. I don't want to see John Wayne strutting through a bar, I don't want to see Steve McQueen driving the new Mustang.

Other adversting dislikes include, "going inside the technology" and "a whacky mistake cause the colors of your food to be different!"